so i watched survivor after attending two happy hours (both on the west side!), so if i’m a little fuzzy on the details, blame it on captain chardonnay and sargeant tiredhead.
ravu is not looking good at all. even though they managed to avoid tribal council last week, they are still really weak and tired and hungry. rocky has a wide-eyed look on his face at all times, and i’m half-expecting him at any moment to drop down on all fours and start chewing on sticks and howling at the moon. yau man confides in his man, earl, that he has a solid list of clues and maybe they can callaborate to get this damn idol out of the sleeping area? so earl hooks a little brother up by taking the tribe on a wild goose chase for um? scenic views of the island? but not actual food? slick, earl, slick.
but, alas, the yauster is muy unsuccessful and the hidden idol remains true to its name. um, hidden. the yauster. does anyone else think i’m hilarious besides myself?
there was some montage about how rita and michelle like to talk about lip gloss or something and it bores the ever living shit out of the guys. and then there’s tree mail and its a bunch of pictures of things they may NEED and things they may WANT. rocky tries to convince the tribe that they should get the delicious chocolate cake, instead of you know, fishing gear or something. rocky’s losing his mind, right?
the reward challenge involves a really really sad sumo match where ravu’s lack of energy is actually painful. the only ravu tribe member to actually win one of the matches was effing YAU MAN, people. YAU MAN. the greatest part of that (besides how unassumingly awesome yau man can be in weird moments) is that he beats stacy. which was good. because, as it turns out? she’s a total bitchface. which we learn back at moto while they enjoy the fruits of yet another win. also a bitchface? lisi. but we already knew that one. alex & edgar start to think about actual strategy instead of stuffing their faces for once, and decide to think a little into the future about what might actually happen in a merger if they keep alienating dreamz and cassandra. who, incidentally, are already planning to flip upon a merge. SHOCKING.
moto wins the challenge (again, shocker) and so ravu is left to decide who goes and they actually surprise me by getting rid of rita instead or worthless anthony. they are all crazy.