1. i "get" to eat all the damn time. granted, i'm gaining weight in weird places and my jeans are getting too small in the quads (as a bonus they are LOOKING "really big," according to my chiro. um f*ck you very much, dr.)
2. i've been getting more massages than a squirrel has nuts, which i have to tell you, DOES NOT SUCK. does not suck at all. in fact! today i had probably the most amazing massage of my entire life. to be fair, there have been times when i've had THE BEST TACO BELL TACO OF MY ENTIRE LIFE or BEST CAN OF UNIDENTIFIABLE CANNED FOOD OF MY ENTIRE LIFE, but let's be honest, i was probably pretty drunk at those times. my point being, this may or may not have been the best massage of my entire life, but when juxtapose the fact that i was up at 6a to run 14 miles today, the relative AWESOMENESS probably triples. nay, quadruples. (get it? QUAD....right.)
3. every week, i do more by 9a than most people do all day. [insert weird creepy glee here]
4. i'm starting to become "familiar" with venice & santa monica beach bums, runners, cyclists and SAVE THE [WHATEVER] campaigners. i get to be a psuedo beach person without losing my, well, soul. ....SCORE.
5. unlike my quads, which may or may not be huge and may or may not fit in my jeans, my calves are looking pretty badass. i rather enjoy watching myself flex and unflex them in the mirror at the gym. did i just admit that? well, it's true. additionally, new side-of-the-thigh muscles are emerging and if i stand at the right angle in the right light, you might mistake me for someone pretty awesome, such as bruce jenner. actually, i hope you don't mistake me for bruce jenner, maybe someone a little less, um, manly and QUADly.
2 comments:
Bruce Jenner muscles look like mine.
Oh and another thing, your quads are big because of the drunk cartwheels and piggy rides for people 3 times your size not from all that running!
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